My baby child is officially weaned.
I have mixed feelings about it because it might have been the last little one that I will ever feed.
However, breastfeeding is hard work for my body and energy, and I need every ounce of that back again.
So, my little darling is weaned. That is it. My longest breastfed baby is now on his own. And without too much harumphing from himself either.
(phew! - because I think I would have easily been talked out of weaning with a little clever nudging and objecting.)
He also had his very first big boy haircut in Melbourne on Thursday. He wiggled like a worm, but she managed to get the whispy bits that tangle up off and fix up his sideburns to not look like a little scragglemuffin. Fortunately, he still looks like my baby - just a bit more tidy.
And so.. this begs a question...
Before I had Monty - I had two little cherubs. I felt calm, happy, in control, and could manage anything.
Upon having 3 ankle biters, I felt totally overcome, still very happy about adding his precious little soul to our lives, but everything still seems 3times harder, and terribly overwhelming.
So.... does this mean, now that he is weaned, walking, etcetera etcetera... That those feelings of calm will return one day?
Can I really manage being a calm, happy mamma of three?
Will I be able to sew again?
Do my artwork again?
Get into Gardening again?
Do the simple things that enrich me?
Will I be able to tackle our new (very challenging) farmhouse and get it to be a happy place for my family?
Because, to be honest - those things have had a big handbrake put on them for quite some time.
Don't get me wrong... I would much rather NOT do those things and have the sublime love and enormous heart that I have for and with my family.
But tell me - is there a light at the end of the tunnel? Is there sleep for me in the future? Is there a chance of having some energy to run on instead of running on empty 24/7?
